The Lady in the Cake

by TheInfamousFly


...in the pudding!

Rarity sat beside the bed and watched Pinkie twitch under the covers.

She'd had to enter the hospital room exceedingly slowly, for she knew if she woke Pinkie up, then Pinkie would feel the need to be "on". She was always like that. Even when she was in as much pain as the rest of them, she tried to put a smile on their faces.

Rarity knew what that was like, to be feel the need to deflect. To find your worth in what you provided to others. Except Rarity had learned to be selfish, to be ambitious. Pinkie seemed perfectly content to be the way she always had been. But of course, Rarity wouldn't have been able to tell even if that wasn't true. Between the two of them, one of them was good at masking her emotions and it wasn't Rarity.

"Did you find who hurt Pinkie?"

Maud sat across from her, on the other side of Pinkie's bed. She'd placed Boulder on the table beside Pinkie's table Boulder to watch after her and he now sat on the table beside Pinkie's bed.

Rarity didn't answer. She knew who was responsible, of course. It was painfully obvious. But she didn't have any evidence. She also didn't want to expose the creature responsible, not when doing so would not only hurt them but their family, ponies that Rarity knew and loved, as well.

She stared at the covers, watching them slowly rise and fall with Pinkie's shallow breaths. She reminded herself of Stinging Nettles' body, under that wagon. If anypony had deserved such a fate, that mare had. She wasn't sure why, but tricking ponies into taking their own lives seemed so much worse somehow than taking those lives yourself.

But if the murderer had been mistaken, if they had targeted the wrong pony, just as Pinkie had been the mistaken target of the cyanide, then it would have been a different unicorn lying there in the road, with their skull cracked bashed open like a walnut.

It could have very easily been Rarity.

Slowly, she stood and walked around Pinkie's bed.

"I'm guessing that's a no?" Maud asked, as Rarity exited the room.

She had to get out of here, out of this building which stank of bleach and death. Fresh air. That's what she needed. She paused though, at the possibility that it would make things worse. That the sweetness of the flowers planted just beyond the clinic's front entrance would only remind her of that dreadful scene.

Stinging Nettles had been killed just outside the palace gardens after all. Would Rarity ever be able to smell gardenias again without thinking about it? About the blood pooling at her hooves, about the smear of red on the bricks of the wall...

"Rarity? Are you alright?"

It was Applejack. She'd been the one to pull Rarity away from the scene, while everycreature was panicking or screaming. She'd been the one to report what had happened to Flash Sentry as well, while Rarity just sat and stared at nothing.

Now she was holding a mug of something. Cider. Fresh from a Sweet Apple Acres keg and scented with cinnamon. Celestia knew where Applejack had gotten it, but the question was too far from Rarity's mind to be important at just the moment.

"Drink this, sugarcube."

Rarity felt a hoof on her shoulder, steadying her, and twisted to see that Apple Fritter had come up behind with a similar expression to Applejack.

Rarity had the insane urge to push the drink away and start screaming and flailing about. But she knew if she started, she wouldn't be able to stop. So instead, she opened her muzzle and drank deeply, almost emptying the mug in one long gulp. The coolness of the liquid dissipated the heat of her headache and the sting of the acid across her delicate palette got her blinking again.

"Applejack..." She said, staring at nothing in particular, as she lowered the mug.

"Yes, Rarity?"

"How do you make cider?"

Applejack laughed. "Rarity, you helped us make some, remember? When the Flim-Flam brothers first came to-"

"Yes, Applejack. But that was for a cider-making competition. Is that really how you make it when you aren't in a rush?"

"More or less. Course we cut the core out normally, just cause they make it a little more bitter."

Rarity nodded and took another sip of the cider.

"You'd barely notice if you weren't a cider maker of course, but it's the details that make the difference."

Rarity nodded again. The details. Ah.

"Apple Fritter?"

"Yes, Rarity?"

"Why is the core more bitter than the rest of the apple?"

"Oh, uh...is...is this some kinda metaphor? You know about what's inside of ponies or somethin'?"

Rarity shook her head.

"Well, the core is more bitter cause it's there to protect the seeds. And the seeds are more bitter because you aren't supposed to eat them."

Applejack smirked. "Or if you are supposed to eat them, you're supposed to-"

Rarity was snapped out of her shock by her pure outrage for what was about to be shared. "Applejack!"

"What? You asked..."

"Yes but...look, I don't know much about cooking, certainly not as much as you two...or Pinkie. All the same, aren't you not supposed to eat apple seeds because they're...poisonous?"

Applejack and Apple Fritter shared a look and frowned. "Well, yeah, but you'd have to eat so many for it make any difference..." Applejack began.

Rarity nodded. "But if you crushed enough apple seeds, like you crush apples for cider, you could make a solution which was poisonous."

"Yes, but it take dozens, maybe hundreds of apple seeds to do something like that!" Applejack answered.

Rarity nodded again. "But the poison that's in apple seeds...it's in other things, too, isn't it?"

Applejack nodded and began listing off all the different seeds and fruit stones which contained cyanide in them. Rarity stopped her with a raised hoof.

"Applejack...Apple Fritter...I know who the murderer is. But to catch them, we are going to have to do something...drastic."


The National Desserts Competition had been put on hiatus, which was enough to draw the attention of the Canterlot Times. And as soon as the Canterlot Times realized that one of the judges, who happened to be a member of the Elements of Harmony, had been poisoned, every paper in Equestria wanted to know what had happened at the competition. Rarity considered herself lucky that she'd had one day to investigate, where the gardens weren't besieged by ponies with microphones.

Now Flash Sentry and the rest of the palace guard had been relegated to keeping the dozens of reporters from swamping the deserted gardens and harassing the contestants within, as well as providing security for Pinkie's room back at the hospital.

It was a crisp afternoon and Rarity had been relegated to drinking more coffee just to stay awake. She lamented how badly this murder investigation was going to throw her fall line out of whack and comforted herself with the thought that, once this was all finally done, she could submit herself to the throes of completely irresponsible naps.

A single cloud hung in the sky over Canterlot as she gathered both contestants and judges in front of the statue of Tirek, Queen Chrysalis and Cozy Glow.

"I want to thank you all for coming. Rest assured, that after today, the competition will resume as normal. Although I suspect many of you may feel the need to drop out, somewhat lowering the number of entrants." Rarity said, before yawning.

Sweetcream Scoops, Sugar Belle, Saffron Masala, Cinnamon Chai and Apple Fritter stood on the lawn, in the shadow of a topiary of Discord (he'd insisted on giving the trio of statues behind Rarity something "pretty" to look at). Zesty Gourmand and Mulia Mild stood to either side of the statue, watching Rarity with more suspicion than any of the contestants.

"I just wanted to apologize for how long it took me to solve this case." Rarity said. "The truth is, that I knew something was wrong the other day when I first visited this garden, I just wasn't sure what it was until this morning when I was talking to my good friend Applejack. I tried to warn Pinkie..." Rarity stared at the ground. "...she loves food so much. Perhaps even more than I love fashion." She gave a little laugh. "She told me you put a piece of yourself into something, when you cook it. And when it's eaten, that piece you put in there is gone forever."

Slowly, she lifted her head. "She loved this contest. I rather suspect all this nonsense that the lot of you have come with will have somewhat ruined that love when she gets out of the hospital. But I also believe that her love of food will withstand this incident, for which you all should be glad. Rest assured that as merciful a ruler Twilight is, the punishment for killing a cult leader would pale in comparison to dimming Pinkie's light." She cast a baleful gaze at Zesty. Then she cleared her throat. "We are going to go to each workstation and we are going to check all of your ingredients. One of you-" Her speech was interrupted by another yawn. "-has a vial containing the cyanide used to poison Sweetcream Scoops' supply."

"Shouldn't I be exempt from this?" Sweetcream asked.

"Certainly not." Rarity yawned for a third time. "We are checking everyone's ingredients, and we are doing it in front of every creature involved in this competition so that there will be no opportunity to hide anything."

"What about Gustav?" Mulia asked. "Where is he?"

"He's actually being questioned by the guards as we speak." Rarity said.

"Does that mean he did it?" Cinnamon asked.

"Well, we'll have a chance to find out when we search his table, now that he's gone." Rarity stated.

"Rarity, if this is true, Mulia and I should be allowed to leave. We are not contestants and since you are checking only the contestants' ingredients, there's no reason we should be forced to participate in this waste of time." Zesty stated.

"If you wish to exit the garden, you are well within your rights to do so, Zesty. But rest assured there are unicorns by every exit to the garden and pegasi in the turrets overlooking it. Any creature who leaves without express permission from me, will be shackled and brought to the dungeons for further interrogation." Rarity said, marching past them all and ignoring their shocked faces.

"You can't do that?"

"This is an outrage!"

Rarity smiled. "Shall we begin with our dear griffon friend?"


They started with Gustav's creme brulé. Then they moved to Saffron's gulab jamun, rasgulla and toasted coconut ladoo, then Cinnamon's banoffee pie, then Apple Fritter's fritters, then Sweetcream's double chocolate peanut butter mashmellow encrusted swirl with sea-salt twist.

And finally, to Sugar Belle's apple and almond pie.

There were the normal ingredients to be expected. Brown sugar, flour, apple crumble pie crust, eggs, sliced apples, honey, cinnamon, plus a little dish of crushed almonds. Sugar Belle had actually completed a pie the previous day, which now sat on the edge of her table, having gone shamefully untasted.

There was also a little crystal bottle, barely bigger than the cinnamon shaker, containing a clear liquid. Rarity levitated it up off the table as soon as she saw it and cast a spell to sense for cyanide.

The vial glowed bright purple in response to her magic, before returning to its regular color.

"Zesty, would you do the honors of double checking the contents of this vial for us all?" Rarity asked as Sugar Belle watched in horror.

Zesty sighed but her horn buzzed with magic and the same effect was revealed.

"Well, that just about settles it, doesn't it?" Rarity asked, tucking the vial into a soft velvet pouch and then placing that into her saddlebag. "A vial of cyanide amongst Sugar Belle's ingredients."

"But I...I didn't..." Every creature turned to look at Sugar Belle, who was aghast, desperately trying to summon an explanation.

She looked between them all, their faces a mixture of disgust, confusion and fear. Then her eyes locked with Apple Fritter and a calm understanding came over her.

"Please, Rarity...I've never seen that vial before in my life." Sugar Belle said, in a low voice. "It's true, I lied about who I was...I hated Lullabye but...but I would never...please, Rarity..."

Rarity stepped closer and to the surprise of most of the attendants, placed a hoof on Sugar Belle's shoulder. "It's alright, darling. I know you didn't do it."

"What!?" Zesty glowered. "The vial was in her ingredients. She was the only one of us connected to that mare that died."

"Are you certain about this, Rarity?" Saffron asked, puzzled.

"Oh, I'm quite certain. But I didn't have the proof I needed until maybe, half an hour ago." Rarity said. Then she turned to face the one cloud in the sky. "Oh, Mr. Le Grand? You can come down now!"

There was the flap of wings as the griffon descended, landing just beside the shocked Apple Fritter and adjusting his chef's hat meticulously.

"Gustav, be a dear and tell every creature here what I told you to do before I requested everyone meet me by the statue?"

Gustav cleared his throat. "You asked that I sit on the cloud that the pegasi had procured for you and watch Madame Belle's with my 'eagle-eyed vision' until you signaled otherwise."

"And did you by any chance happen to spot anything while you were there?" Rarity asked.

Gustav opened his beak to reply, and a hoof slammed into him, throwing him into Saffron, Sweetcream and Cinnamon in one go. Then Apple Fritter grabbed Mulia around the neck one hoof and grabbed the knife that Sugar Belle had used to chop apples with the other.

"Don't none of you move! Especially, you Rarity! I see you try to do any of yer fancy magic I make what happened to Lullaby look sweet by comparison!" Apple Fritter snarled.

Sugar Belle stared at her in absolute shock and then at Rarity's nonplussed expression in even more shock.

"Apple Fritter, do you really think taking a hostage is going to improve your situation at this juncture?" Rarity asked. "There's nowhere to go."

"Says you. Maybe you lied about them guards being all over the place. Or maybe they'll zap me as soon as they see me with Miss Mild at knifepoint, but either way I ain't about to stand trial for my crimes. I ain't waiting for you to reveal to my family I'm a murderer."

Rarity sighed. "There isn't going to be a trial, Apple Fritter. Your experiences with the Order of Lunar Temple have affected you. Princess Twilight will understand that. If you let her, she can help you. You can become the pony that your family thinks you are."

Apple Fritter let out a little scream of frustration. "Damn you! Why couldn't you keep your muzzle out of other pony's business? Why couldn't ya leave well enough alone!"

"Apple Fritter, I-I don't understand," Sugar Belle looked between Apple Fritter and Rarity.

"I was part of the cult, you idiot! You were Mane Cook and I was White Apple. Not that you'd remember...you ran away and left me and my family to lay on the ground bubbling at the mouth from the cyanide Lullaby had us drink!" Apple Fritter cried, pressing the edge of the carving knife closer to Mulia's throat.

By this point, the shock and confusion had faded from everycreature save Sugar Belle and they were all standing again and in a semi-circle around Apple Fritter.

"All you stay away! I'll kill 'er! I've killed before! I can do it again! None of you try to get any closer to me or else!" Apple Fritter shrieked, swinging the blade back and forth for emphasis.

"You survived the poison, just like Pinkie will." Rarity said calmly. "You were given a second chance at life, Apple Fritter, with a second family. Don't throw it away."

"You think I'm gonna listen to your honeyed words after you played the fool out of me! How did you figure it out? How did you know?" Apple Fritter demanded, continuing to back away from them all, but keeping her eyes on Rarity.

Rarity took a deep breath. "Hot sauce."

"What?!"

"You said you poured hot sauce on Sugar Belle's almonds. Sugar Belle is a talented chef. She would have noticed something so viscous, even if it wasn't brightly colored, as I suspect most hot sauce is. Then I remembered something Pinkie said, about how your apple fritters tasted like they were store bought. Now why would you go to the trouble of coming to Canterlot and entering this competition if you had no intentions of actually baking. That told me you didn't come to compete." Rarity stepped closer. "And then you told me about Sugar Belle's past. The Apple Family are honest, but they are also loyal. They would never rat out a member of the family to save themselves. So, I began to wonder what it was you were hiding, why you might have lied about what you put on Sugar Belle's almonds, and why you were so desperate to shift focus onto her."

"You stay away! Just keep back from me, or else!"

"It occurred to me that Lullabye didn't come here looking for Sugar Belle. She came here looking for you, Apple Fritter. She hated that you survived her little game. No creature will blame you for what you did to her, Apple Fritter. You are a sick pony. You are not well. Please let me help you."

Apple Fritter glared back at her. Rarity's eyes met, momentarily with Mulia's. One good jerk of an elbow and she could probably incapacitate the wild Pony who'd tackled her. Not only were mules stronger than ponies, but Mulia was trained in all kinds of self-defense. Apple Fritter was just a crazed mare with a knife in her hoof.

Rarity shook her head though. This had begun with violence, the most unspeakable kind of violence. The kind which a creature is tricked into performing on itself. It would end peacefully if it was the last thing she did.

"If you won't listen to me, please, listen to her." Rarity said, her eyes shifting to the hedge which Apple Fritter was backing into.

Apple Fritter twisted and paused when she saw Applejack stepping out from around the hedge.

"Apple Fritter." Applejack said, her eyes wet but her voice terribly firm. "I know you're scared right now. I know you're scared that we won't love you none if you admit what you did and let the guard take you in. But that's not right. You're still part of our family. We're not gonna give up on you. Not unless you do. So, please put down the knife."

Apple Fritter's hoof trembled. Then she let go of Mulia and the knife and plunged into Applejack's hooves, grabbing hold of her and shaking against her with great wracking sobs, shaking her head and screaming to the high heavens. Rarity quickly levitated the knife back to its place on the table, while every creature save Sugar Belle fled before things got worse.

"I-I don't understand..." Sugar Belle said.

"I'll explain it all later." Rarity whispered. "But for right now, I think Apple Fritter needs your help. I'd understand if you were reluctant to give it...all the same I think it would help immensely if somepony granted her a little...perspective."


They were at Joe's. It was the only bakery still open by the time that they'd calmed Apple Fritter, then slowly walked her out of the garden and into the palace to relay her confession (plus Rarity had needed to catch up ask Spike for a very special favor). Sugar Belle had decided to stay back at the palace and to accompany Apple Fritter until she was in a more "stable" place mentally.

Luckily, Pinkie had been feeling better already and Applejack and Rarity thought it only right to reward her for suffering through the past two days of nauseous hell, by bringing her their regular table at Joe's shop and piling a plate of donuts between them. Normally Rarity avoided such greasy confectionaries, but after a long day she was thankful for any sustenance.

"But what was Gustav going to say?" Pinkie asked, after they'd related the whole story.

"He was going to reveal he'd witnessed Apple Fritter planting the vial in Sugar Belle's ingredients. Before I gathered everypony, I'd requested his help ascertaining the murderer. He became quite amenable when I promised him a position in the royal kitchen." Rarity said. "It was about time Twilight was introduced to the fineries of Marisian cuisine anyway."

"You'know you could have asked me to spy on Apple Fritter for ya, just like you could have told me you knew she was the one that was guilty." Applejack said.

"Jacqueline, you are a master of the culinary arts, an intelligent buisinessmare, an expert rodeo pony and one of the bravest creatures I know. You are neither stealthy, nor particularly adept at keeping a secret." Rarity said. "I apologize for concealing so much from you for so long, but I knew you'd give the game away if I'd informed you sooner."

Just then the bell over the door tingled and Saffron Masala stepped inside, and, looking rather sheepish sat down beside Rarity. Rarity sighed. Every creature liked a good mystery. Even when they were soaked in tragedy and pain, ponies wanted to know how they ended, how the clues fit together.

"Ooh! Ooh! Maud's got a question! Go on, Maud, ask them! Ask them!" Pinkie said, prodding her sister lightly with her hoof.

Maud, who'd insisted on coming with Pinkie from the clinic and who'd made it her job to sniff all of Pinkie's donuts before giving them to her to make sure they weren't poisoned, glanced at Pinkie and then at Rarity. "Why did Apple Fritter put it on Sugar Belle's table?" She asked.

"Jacqueline, perhaps you'd care to explain it to them how I did to you?" Rarity asked.

Applejack snorted and took off her hat. "Rarity figured out something was amiss about Apple Fritter. So, Twiight put her in contact with some friends of ours at the J. Edgar Hooves building and they showed her a file they had on Apple Fritter. Turned out she was one of the three survivors of the Order. She drank the poison Lullaby gave her and ended up in the hospital. It wasn't until after she got out, she met Goldie and became part of the family...of course, we always knew she had a rough past from the start. But we'd never imagined it was this bad..."

Pinkie nodded. "That's why did she poisoned me then? Because she was part of an evil cult?"

"No. She never meant to poison you, Pinkie. Well, technically, when she started out, she meant to poison you and Zesty and Mulia when you ate Sugar Belle's pie. That's why Sweetcream caught her sprinkling cyanide on Sugar Belle's almonds. She was tracing them with poison, so the three of you would get sick and Sugar Belle would be discredited."

"But...why?" Saffron asked.

Applejack shook her head. "Apple Fritter's parents, although you could barely call them that, they decided they'd rather drink poison then look after her. And they wanted her to do likewise...she didn't think she deserved to have a lovin' family after that. She was afraid that Sugar Belle would recognize her and when she did, everythin' about the cult would come out and we'd all turn against her."

"That's terrible!" Pinkie said.

"Yeah, well, she thought the only way to make sure no pony would believe Sugar Belle was to frame her for poisoning somepony else. Then Sweetcream caught her, and she had to poison her to make sure she didn't tell Sugar Belle. Except you ate the ice cream before Sweetcream could taste test it."

Pinkie paused for a moment. "That makes sense." Then she grabbed another donut.

She was stopped by her sister, before she could chow down though. Maud leaned over, gave the pink frosting two long whiffs, then exchanged a look with Boulder and before she'd even finished nodding Pinkie had already inhaled the treat.

"I feel sorry for her..." Applejack said. "It's tough losing somepony. But losin' everypony all at once...I don't exactly blame her for what she did that Lullaby."

"Ah, but it wasn't revenge, it was fear." Rarity said. "Apple Fritter was afraid Lullaby would expose her, just as she was afraid of Sugar Belle. From the second I heard her story in that deplorable apartment of hers, I knew something was wrong. So, I asked her to accompany me, to help with the case, so I could keep an eye on her. Then last night, while we were at the clinic, Applejack brought me some cider. It reminded me how my parents always warned me against eating the apple's seeds when I was a filly. So, I asked Applejack about the seeds, and she mentioned that one of the fruits which has cyanide in it, besides apples are almonds."

"Technically, only bitter almonds." Pinkie interjected between mouthfuls of fried bread.

"Yes, well, I'd assumed that Apple Fritter had tried to poison Sweetcream and I knew she'd killed Lullaby Solfège. But I had no idea what her original plan was until that moment. She'd put the cyanide on Sugar Belle's almonds because she'd known they would just taste like bitter almonds to the judges. That's when I told Applejack we needed to search everycreature's ingredients. I knew Apple Fritter would jump on the chance to frame Sugar Belle and put an end to the investigation."

"So...you lured her into revealing herself to Gustav?" Saffron surmised.

"Yes. I was afraid she might not take the bait at first." Rarity admitted. "But it was the only thing I could think of to get her to reveal herself. She'd been sneaking around, poisoning Sweetcream's ice cream and pushing carts down hills without anycreature noticing. I needed her in a wide-open area with an aerial observer."

"Speaking of Sweetcream, what is gonna become of her or the rest of us for that matter?" Saffron asked.

Rarity smirked. "Well, let's see. Gustav just a new job, one that he'll probably be too involved in to continue competing, Apple Fritter is undergoing psychological counseling, Sugar Belle has lost all interest, not that I think any of us can blame her. That just leaves you, Sweetcream and Cinnamon, if you three could just come to an arrangement you would each get 500 bits."

"What do you mean? One thousand split three ways is not five hundred." Saffron said.

Pinkie smiled. "Good catch!"

"She means that the only reason Cinnamon Chai entered the competition was because she planned on givin' the winnings to you." Applejack with a disapproving glare in Saffron's direction.

Saffron blushed. "It would be wrong to accept such generosity from her."

The bell jingled again, and Rarity smirked, although only Pinkie seemed to notice.

"Well, why in tarnation not? For Pete's sake, two of my relatives were part of a cult and Pinkie just survived being poisoned. Why can't you get together with somepony you love?" Applejack demanded.

Saffron lowered her gaze to the table. "Her mother refused me permission to marry her. I cannot force her to choose between the pony she loves and her family."

Applejack rolled her eyes. "Is that it? My grandfather didn't approve of my dad. Now he's like a second father to us. Things change."

"Yeah, and even if they don't, her mother isn't the one marrying you." Pinkie said, barely able to contain the wild grin curling across her face.

"I understand your reluctance, darling." Rarity added. "But I'm sure if you talked through about this matter with Cinnamon Chai, the two of you could reach some manner of compromise."

"Or at the very least, closure." Maud said, despite having no context for the conversation and having never met Saffron until this moment.

Saffron shook her head. "I will not drive her apart from her mother. It is better for us both that we go our seperate ways and find somepony new."

"But I don't want somepony new!"

Saffron turned, shocked to find Cinnamon standing right behind her, holding the missive that Rarity's little scaled helper had delivered half an hour ago, requesting Cinnamon come to Joe's shop for "royal business".

"I love you, Saffron. You're a beautiful mare, with a wonderful way around the kitchen. If my mum is the only thing coming between you and me getting married, I'd rather tell her to stuff it up a chimney then spend another night without you!" Cinnamon declared.

Saffron looked away. "No, Cinnamon...it will never work, please, I just..."

Cinnamon took Saffron's hoof and pulled her closer until they were muzzle to muzzle. "Tell me you don't love me, and I'll call the whole thing off."

Saffron stared into Cinnamon's eyes and then the two of them kissed in the grandiose and over-the-top way that only fiancés can.

"Well, this is just about the most foalish thing I've ever seen." Applejack said, before taking a bite of her apple turnover.

Rarity just smiled and leaned on one elbow, too exhausted to maintain proper posture. "Awww...young love."

Pinkie took the opportunity to saddle up next to Rarity and allow her to lean her perfectly combed head against her own aggressively frizzy mane. "Thanks again for everything." Pinkie whispered.

Rarity was already snoring. But the warmth of the mare beside her and the warmth of the maple and powdered sugar donuts digesting in her stomach were enough to bring a smile to her weary face.