Jeff Slater was suddenly opening his eyes, any pain he felt before having completely vanished from his mind. It was hard to believe such a great relief would last since it encompassed his whole body only moments before, even in spite of the morphine drip.
But he wasn’t in the hospital anymore, he could tell that much. The room he was in was brightly lit, but not sterile white like the hospital room he’d spent the better part of who knew how long laying in. This room seemed like it was lit by natural sunlight, which flowed through stained glass windows that hung near the ceiling. The ceiling itself was positioned high up, probably fifty feet from what he could tell, and made the place feel royal. The thought of this being a throne room came to mind.
And a throne room it was, one that was complete with the presence of the new cultural icon, Princess Celestia, sitting atop her throne and looking down at him. She had a gentle smile, one that seemed almost motherly to him, and wore golden regalia around her hooves and a simple crown on her head. Her mane flowed through a nonexistent breeze, and her purple eyes stared down at him kindly.
But what in the world was Celestia doing sitting in front of him? And why wasn’t he in his hospital room with his family? He couldn’t quite put together what had happened yet.
“Welcome to Equestria, my little pony,” the winged unicorn spoke, a voice that was both gentle and firm reaching Jeff’s ears. “We’re glad to have you with us at last.”
“Wait a minute! This is that Equestria Online thing I heard about in the news! What the heck am I doing here?”
And what the heck was going on with his voice? This certainly wasn’t what it was supposed to be. At least, it wasn’t how he remembered it. Granted, he was barely able to speak above a pained whisper the last few weeks, but still. This one was much more high pitched and feminine, the sound of it being completely unfamiliar to him.
His body was unfamiliar, too. Instead of being a human, he was an equine shaped creature, one complete with a mane and hooves on all four of the stumps that were his legs. He could see the tip of his new snout, as well as a horn sticking out of his forehead, like a unicorn. Turning around showed a purple tail attached to his now pinkish colored body, as well as other unexpected things. It made Jeff let out a sigh to see.
So then she was a pony and a girl now. That wasn’t something that happened every day.
But there were more important considerations than those two little things for now. “How is this possible?” she asked. “This is that computer game my kids play. Why am I here?”
“I’m sure you haven’t forgotten the battle with cancer you faced recently,” Celestia said lightly. “Once you went into a coma, your wife became your medical proxy, and allowed doctors to assist you with your emigration to Equestria. You fell into a coma approximately thirty six hours ago.”
“Oh. So then I’m dead? Well, I guess that I sure as heck am glad for this,” she said. “I thought this was about to start shaping up to be a suicide cult from what I heard on the news the last few months. You said it was my wife who decided I should be this… pony girl? But wait! I thought this was a Japanese thing only!”
Celestia giggled, which helped to set the mare a little more at ease. “To emigrate to Equestria, that is correct. Shortly after you went into a coma, accommodations were finalized to transport you to Tokyo for emigration. That’s why there was a thirty six hour gap between your coma and now.”
Jeff couldn’t say she ever remembered having a conversation like that with her family. But then again, she couldn’t say she really remembered much about the last few weeks. Being drugged up and in pain didn’t really make it easy to focus, or help to form new memories outside of pain and the sad faces of her family.
“As for your current form,” Celestia continued, “if you dislike it, there are an endless combination of adjustments that can be made. Whatever pony most fits who you are can be assembled. Would you like to go through it?”
“I might as well, right?” she shrugged, figuring there was nothing she could do but take the unfamiliar circumstances in stride. “I’m not sure why you started off making me a girl though. But is there any way to talk to my wife in here? My kids? How does this all work?”
“All of those things will be explained to you, soon, but first, let’s start with making a pony that best represents you. Do you have an idea of who you would like to be in mind?”
Jeff automatically asked to be a human, but when that idea was shot down under the explanation that she must be an equine, she could safely say didn’t have a clue what she wanted. It wasn’t like she was ever preparing to be turned into a pony, and she never played Equestria Online with her kids either, on account of her recent health.
Celestia didn’t seem to mind though, and the two of them went through testing out the different kinds of ponies and styles. There were essentially three types of equine: unicorns, like she was now, ponies with wings, like bats and what Celestia called pegasi, and earth ponies, which, despite their name, did not look like regular horses. Other than the choice between stallions and mares, they all had the same basic body plan. She couldn’t see why this was necessary. Would it change anything if she was a different kind of pony?
Eventually, the two settled on a unicorn– a stallion– that was basically the same as the mare Jeff was when he arrived, down to the color of his coat and mane. Walking around and trotting– he didn’t know how he was able to do that without issue– was easy, and the pony he was now felt normal enough. So normal in fact that he would’ve believed he was still alive and on Earth if not for being a horse, along with whatever impossible magic Celestia used to change him as they tested out different things. Still, he made a face, although he wasn’t quite sure why. There was nothing wrong with what he and the princess came up with.
“It’s okay to express your discomfort,” she told the stallion before her gently. “I hold no judgments here.”
“I’m not uncomfortable,” he said. “It just… it feels okay. No different than usual, except being a pony. But it feels kind of lacking compared to what you picked out for me. Is that weird?”
“No more strange than your transformation from human into pony. I picked it out because I believed it would suit you and satisfy you, so it would make sense for you to prefer my choices.”
“I’m not a girl though,” he said. “Do you think you can come up with something like that, but as a man? Errr, stallion, I guess?”
“I believe your current form is the closest representation to you without being a mare as can be achieved, and I expect you to find my original choices to be superior.” With the light up of the princess’s horn, Jeff transformed back into a mare, the twin sister of the stallion she was just a moment ago.
The contrast was a little more clear now that she had shifted back and forth between stallion and mare so quickly. The stallion she was a moment ago felt expected, if such a word could be used to describe being a stallion. However, the mare she was now was more natural. It didn’t feel normal per se, but more innate. To what, she didn’t know. Her soul? Did she have a soul? Did she even have a brain anymore if she was inside a computer?
“I’m not a girl though,” she said again, her eyes glancing to the floor now, eyeing her new pinkish hooves. “It feels natural, and I’d be okay with this, I think. But I’m not a girl.”
“Hmmm. I understand. How about this?” Celestia started. “We can continue here working on your body, although I’m quite sure I’ve picked out the form best suited to your satisfaction in the mare you are now. As well, it seems right now we’re getting nowhere in terms of finding a pony better than what I’ve already picked out. Consider this proposal: explore Equestria in the form I’ve picked out for you, and see for yourself whether or not it suits you. If you decide that it does not, consider what specific aspects don’t suit you, and return to me so that we may make those changes. Changing your physical form in short timescales is not a service I typically offer, unfortunately, but I can make an exception in your case, if you would like. Does that sound agreeable?”
What was the mare supposed to do? Say no? It was starting to feel like it was taking a long time to pick out a body, and she was getting anxious to see what this world had in store. It wasn’t like she disliked what Celestia picked for her anyway. She did a much better job in one attempt than Jeff did going through it with her for the last half hour. Plus, if she could change to something else later if she decided she hated this, what harm would there be?
“How much time do I have to think about it?” the mare asked.
“Worry not. There is no time limit for you to consider how you feel,” Celestia told her, placing a wing on her back. “Whether an hour from now or a decade, the time to change will be available if you decide this isn’t a suitable form for you. Now though, you need a new name, as your human identity stops here in Equestria. Do you have any considerations? Or shall I pick one out for you?”
“Can I just go by Jeff Slater?” she asked, although with the way Celestia was talking, she had a feeling she already knew the answer. The princess confirmed it with a knowing smile and a shake of her head.
She was really going to have to go through this? Well, it was at least better than being in pain laying in a hospital bed, she decided. Certainly better than being dead. She might as well try and see how this played out. She didn’t imagine there was much else she could do anyway.
“Let’s see,” Celestia considered as the mare stood before her. “How does the name ‘Candle Light’ sound?”
“That’s one of those pony names people call each other in this game, right?” she asked. “I guess I’ll go with that if I can’t just be named Jeff. It’s as good as anything else, really.”
“Well then, Candle Light,” Celestia said, “all that’s left for your emigration to be complete is a cutie mark. It is out there somewhere for you to earn through discovering yourself. As well, I understand you’re eager to meet with your family again. That shall be arranged for you, although before that, I believe it would be good for you to take time to become accustomed to Equestria while you search for your cutie mark.”
“Okay, but what the heck is a cutie mark?” she asked. “Actually, before that, where the heck am I even going to be staying? I don’t have a house or a job or anything!”
“Accommodations have already been arranged for you,” the princess explained, “and as for working, feel free to work as little or as much as you’d like. There is no obligation to contribute on your part, as Equestria has unlimited resources. The only thing I ask is that you embrace the opportunity to receive satisfaction. Shall I show you to your accommodations now?”
With no objection from Candle Light, Celestia lit up her horn, casting a spell to take the two out of the castle and inside a much smaller place, by comparison at least. It was a large house the two now stood in, bigger than the actual home she had on Earth. Certainly big enough to accommodate herself, her wife, and all of her children. She and Celestia stood in the large open space that was the living room, one that opened up to a dining room behind it and a backyard patio beyond that. Behind them was a bedroom and a bathroom off to one side and a staircase presumably leading to more rooms on the other. If the rest of the house was as good as just the things she saw now, then this would have been her dream home.
“How the heck am I supposed to pay for this?” she asked, before remembering what the princess said earlier. “Are you really gonna just give it to me for free? No mortgage or taxes or anything else? How can you do that?”
“As I said, Equestria has limitless resources. As well, as I’ve said before, the only thing I ask from you, Candle Light, is that you seek satisfaction for yourself, regardless of the form that satisfaction takes.”
“What if I decide that being satisfied means laying around and doing nothing all day? Or, like, doing something that’s just a net drain on society? Like throwing car batteries into the ocean or something?”
Another little laugh came from Celestia, one that made Candle Light put up her first smile as a pony. “I don’t believe that to be the case, but if it was, then you would be more than free to do those things, so long as they truly satisfied you. Are there any other questions I can answer?”
There were a lot, enough to take up a lifetime of Candle Light’s time here. She didn’t bother asking how this was all possible, figuring it would just go over her head. Instead, she saved most of them for now and focus on a few important ones.
“Where am I?” she asked. “I mean, I know I’m in that computer game, Equestria Online, but where specifically am I now? What’s this place like?”
“Right now, you’re in a quiet town known as Summer’s Edge,” she explained. “The residents here are kind and more than eager to assist you with any of your needs. I believe this is a suitable place for you to grow accustomed to life here in Equestria, or live for longer periods if you desire. Your home is situated with a view of the ocean from your backyard, and there are mountain ranges for you to explore if you desire adventure in the opposite direction.”
That sounded nice. She enjoyed going to both places, although her home in Arizona made it a once a year occasion at best, to her misfortune. Now though, depending on how far away it was, she could probably go all the time, especially if she didn’t have a job. Maybe even today.
“And you’re just– you’re really giving all of this to me for free?” she had to ask again. “No strings attached?”
“That’s correct,” Celestia said gently. “Of course, if you grow tired of this town and these experiences, there are a limitless number of places to inhabit and sights to see, and an uncountable number of experiences to be had. I’m sure your children will be able to show you what I mean once you speak to them again. I know you’re already aching to see them, and they’ll visit you soon enough.
“For now though, enjoy your time here, Candle Light. Explore your surroundings and discover your cutie mark and find new experiences. If there’s ever anything you need, no matter where you are in Equestria, you can call me forth at any time. Simply press the picture of my cutie mark, and we may speak. Or if you prefer, you can simply use it as a gentle reminder that I’m here if you need.
“Welcome to Equestria, Candle Light,” Celestia said again, just like before, radiating a powerful aura of completeness. “We’re glad to have you here with us at last.”
The knowing someone better than they know themselves thing is a bit creepy. But that's OK! I am interested to see where this goes!
I guessing there will be a twist later in the story with this setup.
Off to a great start so far.
The transformation from man to mare reminds me about something my nephew said:
My niece convinced him that girls do not poop.
In EquestriaOnLine, nopony must poop.
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Candle Light hasn't pooped once yet in the whole story, so this means your nephew is correct.
This completely works. I am convinced - because of my own personal experience over my six decades, as well as study and research - that there are far more trans people than are currently counted in studies. Some people go through life constantly feeling unease they cannot explain or define. I think some of these folks are trans, and they will never grasp that fact.
Statistically, trans people are, on average, two standard deviations (30 points, one standard deviation is 15) in IQ higher than normal - the average trans person has an intelligence of 130. Of course, some are 120, some 115, and so on, and I personally know of three that are above 140 (not counting myself). Averages, they do that.
I think - strongly - that in order to comprehend that one is trans, one needs a minimum intelligence level. Below around 110, I think, it is much more difficult to truly imagine what such a thing really means, much less to determine the very strange condition that one's own identity does not match one's own body. 100 and below describes, I think, a state where being trans can only be understood very abstractly and vaguely. It is the realm of not comprehending how such a thing could truly be real - the realm of claiming being trans is a 'lifestyle choice' or just straight-up impossible because how could such a thing even be true?
Candle Light has made it clear she has no capacity to understand what her new existence means, and no desire to even try.
Candle isn't the usual smart, clever, bright protagonist - which makes her name just plain hilarious (good job with that, Boopy!). Candle is, well, very basic. The way she responds, the way she reacts, the questions that she considers important to ask in the moment - all indicative of a very average, or more likely slightly below average, human intelligence. I would peg Candle Light at around 95 to 100 IQ. Could have been a cop.
And so it makes total sense to me, that Candle feels so comfortable being a mare without comprehending why, or how that could be, or what it means. She just doesn't have the brains to grasp such a concept on her own. She could learn, have it explained, but it is not something she could just leap to in the way a bright person automatically would.
I find this story exciting for that reason. The usual Optimalverse story inevitably involves a brilliant person playing chess with Goddess, which is to say, CelestiaAI. A battle of wits. But here, we start with an already emigrated person, one that is not bright enough to even understand how a computer actually works, one who is not interested or driven to ask serious, complex, or deep philosophical questions beyond the most trivial "Do I still have a soul if I am in a computer?" about what their situation means. This is a deeply average or below average person, just going with the flow, trying to get along, doing their best to follow instructions. This is not the usual Optimalverse protagonist debating existential concerns while trying to determine whether something perceived still counts as 'real' when considered with regard to the physical world outside. This is not a protagonist eager to learn how they were emigrated, or what the process was, or how the world around them is generated, or what it means to exist in a virtual world.
Candle Light is interested in whether or not she has to pay a mortgage in Equestria. Nobody ever asks that. Nobody in an Optimalverse story has ever not been a seriously smart, technophillic geek before. And that is very, very refreshing. And to make them trans as well?
Oh, I am FULLY on-board for this ride. I am upset I didn't think of it first. Damn. So much can be done with this.
I am all excited, Boopy.
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I think you did a good job summing up the basic premise of the story. Take someone who would basically amount to being a mid-level manager at max and can barely turn on a computer, but has enough curiosity and is open minded enough to want to investigate the world around them, put them in a world that has basically no limitations outside of "you must be a pony", and see what happens, both with them and their family.
I think the answer is gonna be very fun to write c:
Me dio un poco de escalofríos